Losing a friend is difficult

I had a former friend who once gifted me a custom wine glass with the following inscription: “Some people come into our lives and quickly go. Others stay awhile, make footprints on our hearts and we are never, ever the same. With true friends…even water drunk together is sweet enough.” (Circa 2010)

That person and I don’t speak anymore. In fact, when I was going through some of the darkest periods of my life in my mid- to late-20s in the form of unexpected career transitions and mental illness, he proceeded to ghost me repeatedly when I contacted him to reconnect and rekindle our friendship, despite the fact that I was going to school in the same area as him, living about 30 minutes apart. He’s doing quite well professionally. I image not stellar as he’s never been a very technically adept individual. He’s more of a businessman type. “Full of bullshit,” as another one of our mutual friends so eloquently says of this person.

It’s strange because early in my friendship with this individual, I was the one holding back. He never struck me as a particularly ethical human being, or at least someone who cared about being one, and I think I denied his initial advancements for true friendship (e.g. the wine glass). Something always just felt a little off when I interacted with this individual. But even so, losing a friend like this is difficult for me because, as I’ve often been told, I’m just too nice of an individual. Yet, I think as we grow older, we need to let go of people like this that don’t serve us anymore, that harm us and drain our energy with their actions or inactions. Not all friendships are meant to last.

I still have that wine glass in my cupboard, and I have his as well (because I think I was holding it for him at some point during a move or something). He didn’t really ever feel the need to ask for his matching wine glass back, but I think I will keep them nonetheless as a reminder for the type of people that exists in this world.