Anyone who has ever had an intense crush where one cannot stop thinking about an individual for a span of time knows how strong that feeling of infatuation is. It typically isn’t even fair how these feelings develop. It’s literally like getting high. However, it’s important to understand that that is not love proper. That really is kind of just getting high. I think a lot of people mistake that rush of emotion for love. It’s not love, and to confuse an intense crush with love is a very dangerous thing because that intense feeling always fades. Always. When it does fade, you are left with whatever you built–or destroyed–during that period of excitement (i.e. high), and I think for a lot people who do end up linking up during that phase, they’re just left with a lot of empty sex. So, in a sense, that strong feeling of infatuation can be a double-edged sword. It’s how you take advantage of that period of time that matters.
Again, I’ve never been in a long-term loving relationship. I’ve only dated one person for a few months. There was love, but it was more of a platonic form of love. There was absolutely zero of that feeling of infatuation present. It was more of an experiment for me to begin dating for the first time. Plus, that individual was a highly wealthy and powerful person and was able to supply me a very coveted job in the arts in a very glamorous part of downtown Beijing. It was more of an opportunity for career advancement. My feeling for that person never changed throughout our relationship and I think it never will. It was always this flat and endearing form of love. I would still work with that individual today if they reached out because it was in fact purely platonic even though we did engage in sexual activity. There was just zero romantic feeling on my end.
Like mentioned previously, I’ve yet to experience a proper mutually loving relationship, but I’m wise enough to understand that true love is not about that rush of emotions that we see acted out on television or experience in our youth. Prove me wrong.
The Ivory Tower 
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