The modern outlook on sex has strayed far from the historic Victorian attitudes of the 1800s. The average person in the United States loses their virginity around the exact time that they are legally able to have sex: 17 years old. This is far below the average age of marriage, a number that has been rising steadily over time. But sex is not trivial. Ideally, it should hold value between two (or more) people. It should be cherished and celebrate love. Yet, we’ve strayed far from that paradigm into an “it’s just sex” society. I’ve noticed this mentality has two equally damaging interpretations.
On one hand, you have the more stereotypical masculine interpretation: “it’s just sex, so I’m going to have a lot of it.” This leads to a more promiscuous lifestyle that society at large has labeled as morally suboptimal and can result in a life that is empty. To reduce sex to a mere sport, for instance, is to deny oneself an opportunity to create meaning, to experience love, and to forge real connection.
On the opposite end of the spectrum, the more feminine interpretation could be to shun it altogether: “it’s just sex; there are more important things in this world to focus on.” This interpretation can be equally damaging for the same reasons as the masculine one but due to different mechanisms (i.e., celibacy versus promiscuity). Sex is an undeniably important part of health for most people. Orgasm has been shown to improve mood and promote both mental and physical well-being. Physical touch itself has healing powers.
In contemporary society, a war rages between these two interpretations and the people who uphold them. As society becomes increasingly polarized, this leads to more undesirable outcomes surrounding an act that is critical to the human condition. Which interpretation do you hold dear?
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