I had a manic episode the other day with some psychotic features spurred on by trouble sleeping (though I’m not sure if that’s the cause or the effect) and I couldn’t pay attention in the studio and sat petrified in my seat for a few hours. Luckily, it was one of those situations where I was able to make up for lost hours when I awoke from that state. I think I rattled some of my classmates who came up to me a few days later to ask if I was okay. I’m not going to go into the details of what I was thinking for privacy reasons, but it was, unfortunately, a bit delusional. It’s mildly concerning because I’ve been taking all my medications at the moment and this usually doesn’t happen with I’m consistent with my medications, but maybe the art, maybe the fact that I’m in an intensive architecture program kicked it all off.
The mnemonic we learned in medical school for mania is DIG FAST: distractibility, impulsivity, grandiosity, flight of ideas, activity increase, sleep deficit, and talkativeness. I hit maybe around four of those features to a very extreme degree so maybe it wasn’t a pure manic episode; I don’t know, I’m not a physician. I’m not going to go on another rant in this post about the DSM, there’s plenty of previous posts where I complain about that. I wonder what the “dig fast” mnemonic means? I think the saying is that when a person is in mania, they end up digging a metaphorical grave for themselves because many end up in terrible situations. The etiology of the mnemonic is the descension into a dark abyss when one is in full blown mania. I get it.
I’ve been thinking the other day of the pros and cons of being labeled with a psychiatric disorder. I suppose there is benefit in knowing that the symptoms one is experiencing that impedes tasks of daily functioning are the result of an illness and not, what some may assume, to be inherent personal vices or weakness. It does give one some immunity from self-criticism and protects the psyche. As much as I criticize the Western medical establishment, it’s also important to appreciate the silver lining.
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